Boll Weevil! Be sure to bring 'em to the BLOCK PARTY. Let's see iffen he knows how to swing a trowel .. <img border="0" alt="[naughty]" title="" src="graemlins/naughty.gif" />

Cheers, Boiled Peanut

Grits & I sure did luv the Gator Shack over at Bayou Bob's. Big Al's Gills & Grills were fanger lickin' goooood, too.

We'll see ya'll, Boll Weevil, Possum & Boiled Peanut, over at that thar Block Party. Butter Bean's been workin' up a storm, I hear. Whinny has been stormin' up the coast. Sure hope I haven't missed that mortar forkin' contest!

TUSH ON,
Chitlin'

Plenty o'time to start a'forkin', Michele!

Wonderin' who's gonna be crowned Kang or Kween o'forkin'?????? The Kang or Kween is gonna reeceev a januine tin metl incruztd wit flcks o'gld duzt, a'hangin' from twine.

Kween or Kang o' forkin'?? Well now, ain't that nice? Youse krews direktors are sure doin' a bang up job of cruise di-reck-tin'. And a jan-u-ine tin metl to boot! YEE HAW!!!!!!!!!

Nice to have Fry-mah-Hide & Collard Peggy checkin' in har. Hope they caught that thar roller derby. Sure wuz a good-en! Can't wait for dem RE-sults.

Got a couple of entries. One for Kween and one for the Royal Fambly:





Cheers, Boiled Peanut

B.P. now stop showin us pikshurs like that...it dun cauzed Possum to drop his trow(el) he got so xcited and we lost the mortar forkin kontist! :mad:

I waz hopin to have enuff TUSH toekins to get me a soo-vin-ear TUSH plug fer my sea male...evr since he ate them thar stix for lunch he's bin a hootin' and a tootin'! ;)

Shez gotta mity handy cup rezt. Wunder if they sell that inna gift shop!

I gotta hand it to Da-Nees .. oops, I mean Moon Pie (wif prune fillin) .. Makin' sure we not only SEA MORE BUTZ but dat we also BEN DOVER!

Today's eye-tin-ry has us Cruising the Insulation Aisle to Judo. Iffen you want to change, white underwear adds to the fes-tiv-i-tees.

We had a slight ack-see-dent this mornin' with Bendi Kuntorshun. He was demon-straight-in the bes' way to virchu-lee dee-liver The Daily TP. Mebbe it was them gater puppies or dat toke, but when he seed Sue's swuete (pronounced: soo-eey-t) and BUTTler, he skreeched and done fell over.

His dee-sigh-pul, Leslie B, has VOLUNTEERED to lead Xceryz and Eye Test ack-ti-vi-tee TODAY. Be sure to drag yore rear for this SPESHUL Ee-Vent.

Chick out the rest of today's ack-ti-vi-tees:

The Daily TP

Cheers, Boiled Peanut

An donya go furgitn bout de speshul drink o de day. Anuther martini from the box-o-wines-o-de-whirled slekthun!

An dis drink is coshur! (leest I think) It is maid wit Mogen David Blackberry wine, kranberi juz, votka, triple sex, and just a splarsh of lyme. Its cald a Matzopolitan.

Pore Bendi...he looked like a pret-zul cuz he gat to Sea More than he barguned fer! We waz prak-ta-sin fer the FULL MOON partee and he got an eye full! :ohmy:

We R so Xcited fer the big kampfire kookout and sleep over...I hope thar's gonna be a TOKE-A pardy!

We alwayz admired them folks in the kuntry a GREASE fer how they dress and they alwayz are in such a good mood! ;)

ah neva did make it up fo' buttfast this hyar mo'nin' af'er all thet kareeoke last night. ah didn't knows thet Jim Black Velvet B an' Meezer Mama c'd sin' so fine. ah was jest blown away! Fry mah hide!

Gil did manage t'stumble out t'buttfast an' came stumblin' back t'let me knows how fine them butty marys were. His eyes were all bloodshot, doesn't knows if it was th' butty marys o' th' lack of sleep. ah went t'th' houn'dog sheddin' leckure but started t'sneeze. Dawgone allergies!

Af'er lunch ah decided ah needed some xersise, so went t'th' class an' decided t'do th' scratchin as ev'rythin' on me seems t'be itchin, as enny fool kin plainly see. Cain't unnerstan' whuffo' on account o' th' bedbugs seem t'have lef' cuz they didn't like th' smells a-comin' fum th' sueyte. Now it seems ah scratched a bit too much. Thet's ok, th' doc gave me some nice pink cream t'put all on over mah hide. Gil reckons it's so sexy too! Fry mah hide!

Af'er a delicious dinner, we went t'watch th' movie on th' trimenjus TV screen. (Nashunal Lampoon's Vacashun was relly on th' boob tube tonight! Fry mah hide!! Fry mah hide!! Fry mah hide!)ah doesn't knows when ah laughed so hard, cuss it all t' tarnation.

Now ev'ryone is fast asleep in thar sleepin' bags sno'in' away. they sho'nuff passed out quickly af'er they smoked them cigarettes an' drank Jim's special six packs! Guess they were jest tired fum all th' ackivities.

Hey Y'all, Randy an Ay jus got ar foto back from Fermul Nyte. Ay tenk we had fetchun outfits for the evnun. (Don't ya jus love the backgrund. We felt rit at home.)

TUSH Door Cinz Jus In

Hey Y'all, Sury butt the prentirs were late with ar kabn cinz. Hope y'all like the dezin for it.

Beth,
Them kabn cinz is perfek!!! I knew youse worked mighty hard on that rrt work. Thanks!

And I done loved you'lls fermul nyte photo!!

(What a way to start my morning....laughing hysterically to both Beth's and Arleen's posts!!)

Butter Bean

YEE HAW...The South shall rise agin'. Mighty purty formel frocks. Ima toastin' you wid a bottle 'a Rebel Yell.
I tell y'all, John Steinbeck ain't got nuthin' on us TUSHers....."The Grapes of Laugh" :app:

Hey y'all - weez up n at em early!! Wassup fer today? Mebbe the TP waznt slid under my tent flap? Mebbe I took it to the outhouse wit me by mistook???

Do believe weez headed for Skank Way?

Jello fella TUSHees! Dag nab it! I musta been too close to that toke-a-pardy kampfire. Jes shaking them corn-cobs offen my keyboard. Dang I am hon-gree! Where's the feedbag when you need it?

Our pit stop today is Skank Way for all the live-long day. I 'spect y'all reddy knows it's a Nashunl Holly-Day "Futball See-sin Opener". We've dee-signed a full day in honor of this'n here EE-Vent

The Daily TP

Unfortunately, Marvin got his rear twistered too far in Power Pogo. Leslie's workin' her hardest to get him free but it's not lookin' good, TUSHees. Bring yore Oily Olay and mebbe he can be freed. We scrambled to find a re-placement in-struck-shun on Skanks in honor of our pit stop.

Iffen yore glued to yore fav=rite futball game, take a few minits now to lern about them skanks, cane todes. It's a li'l ruff on the young-uns, so send 'em off to play dodge cars in the parkin lot while yore watchin' it.
Skanky: Baz the Cane Toad

Our crack kon-see-urge, Betty K, is fixing up some mite purdy pri-zees fer us. Stay tuned to feast yore eyes on what them toe-kins can virtually win fer ya.

Cheers, Boiled Peanut

Hey Y'all,

Herez a prevue of the Jello Wrasslin' for tonyte..... Don't mizz it nohw.... Y'all come n propreate atire.



Edtited:

This herez a late edichun to de Jel-Low Festival... Bellow Jellow Eatin'..... sign up soon, y'all



Luv ya, Sweet Pea

Well shux me n' Possum godda nuther full dA
on TUSH! Wez so happie that sum one membered we LOVE head CHEEZ cuz wez the biggest CHEEZ HEADS...we love that 1/4back BUTT FARTE (I mean Brett Favre)...sorrie I kan't spel 2 good yet!

Movin' right along to the Jell-O shooders...Mmmmmmm Mmmmmm we will be ferst in line. MayB b4 the kompatishun we shood have a inny/outy belly buttin kontest!

Hey R-leen u upta drawin a tATTOO ON ME? It looks like us galz need one ta git in the rasslin festuval.

B.W.

That thar fota lookz lik the midnite jello an'tumy lickin' boofay!

An' don' foget tadaze martini spechil. Dis 1 is anuda faverot from da box-o-wines of da whirld klechun an surved ina sueveneer glASS! Dis wus mi ressipee frumwen I wus da hed some-moll-yay on dat Itly shyp. Dis one is mixt wit Riunite Lambrusco, has da cranberri juz, tripple sex (gotta go ez iffin ya has a bad tickkr), and votka. I calsita Costapolitan!

Tmara, we havin' sumpti extry spechil so ya don' wanna mis out! Alda sem as abov cept sted of Lambrusco we make it wit two buck chuk of calyfoyrneyea! I calsita Calypolitan! A hooge favrite of my frend Denise (Moon Pye) an' ha twyn cusin, da tolet seet kween, Reah Gurgitate!

Moon (PitM) Pie will take 3, please!!!

Don - wuz that YOU on dat Costa Cruise in 1982? Swilling that glASS and showin' such clASS? I done think you fixed up my first Costapolitan!

We's needing four ta stroll memry lane once more. Diane and Gary will keep it quite merry.

Ohhhh.. Calipolitans tmra. Ken't weight!

Cheers, Boiled Peanut

Thanks to Ms Winnie for helping me to find this thread - must be the computer - couldn't be me!

Crikey, your furrin correspondent from down under can be pretty dumb at times - Don, can you help me out? What is 'shee-roz?' Good on yer mate!

TUSH is just a larf a minnut! Fair dinkum!!

Howdy thar my fren' from WAY down yonder! Been a hopin' you could ketch up wid us in Scank Way...ain't seen ya since Clam Gulch...thet place bout did me in...phew. Need ta git crackin' wid my crack pot and make some grub. We havin' Grand Manure for de-zert!!

Moon Pie

Good to see ya, Down Undah Wondah! Keep them reports comin!

Lotsa piles of fresh and ripe manure ready for the fixins, MZ Whinney!

Good morning, TUSHees. You'll find your Daily TP unner yore door extry-early. We've got a very full set of ack-ti-vi-ties fer ya.

Today's pit stop is tha one we all been waitin fer:

SIT COM

The Daily TP

So enjoy a heapin' helpin of TUSH hospitality. Set a spell. Take yore shoes off.

Cheers, Boiled Peanut

Hey thar, BP, AY jus found a foto of som sengle guys praktisin for ar Grape Stompin kontest. Elurt all de fin sengle ladees of these kute fellars kumin onbord today.



Sweat Pea

Dat's sum FINE SEA MALE spottin' you dun, Sweat Pea!

I'm axing our kon-see-urge Butter Bean to a-ward youse some extry toe-kins.

See you at them stompin' grounds to-nite!

Cheers, BP

NUTER SPECHUL NOTICE frum youse Kon-see-urge
**************On Toe-can Redem-shun**********

I knows some of youse has catched quite a slew of them toe-cans. (I thank I seen Don wit he's overalls pockets arunnin' over)
Anyways, I thanked you'd like to see wat spechul prizes them toe-cans can fetch ya!

Hers a samplin':


So git busy TUSHees....work hard...cause I thank youse will agree, it's gol darn worth it!!

Youse Kon-see-urge......Butter Bean Betty

And a Pee-S to my las mess-age!

NO self res-pec-tin TUSHee will want to go home without 1 of these:


Youse Kon-see-urge....BBB

Set a spell and relax, 'cause tonight is The Grape Stompin' contest, where all you TUSHees work yerself into a stompin' frenzy! No need to wash yer feet, clip yer toenails, or shave yer legs for this one. All those natural ingredients only add to the full-body taste and aroma of the Half-A-Buck-Pickup-Truck-Roadkill-Fer-The-Potluck wine!

See ya' at the Stompin'! Ya ain't been to TUSH lessen you stomped at the CRUSH!

BP, Might fine job!

Lots o'toe cans are gonna be reedeemed tonight! Them prizes are THE best, one-of-a-kind!
When yer friends see 'em, you'll be the envy of yer trailer park!

Butter Bean, 'member i'm yer fren, so slip one a dem ashtrays under the washtub an sav fer me. i'm not doing so hot winnin' toe cans but tonite is the nite I shine!I gots pre-hensile toenails that are a' itchin' to stomp!

Whewwwwwieee we jist rolled our BUTTS outa bed...done missed brekfist and lunch.

Kan't find my fone to call that wunnerful sum-melly-ear Don to bring us a pitchr fulla tudayz speshul. Hey Don toss a few merra-shino cherryz in there so we gets r Frooot fer the day! :p

That Sing Along wit Mitch Miller last nite was a doozie, yet a bit much fer me and Possum. We waz singin "show me the way ta go hom I'm tyred and I wanna go ta bed. I had a koalapolitan a minit a go an it went rite to my head".

Ole Possum waz dremin' he waz in the exyrcize progrum and waz pee'in off the balkony jist a yell'in I WON I WON giv me ma toe-kinz. I had ta slap 'em along sid the head to wak 'em up!

Boll Weevill - Hope you git yore FROOT yestidday. It's neerin' the endda our non-krews, TUSHees, so we are on root to Bruising Hubbard Squash fer our lastest day. Bettrn a root kanal, Chitlin sez.

The Daily TP

I'z gots ta fine T. Leary, who done gone on a nudder trip (what's wid dat??), so when we hit Fiddler, we kin head off to Denial tomorrer. Don't ferget the COMPLIMENTARY Doom and Gloom we left BEHIND yore door.

Have a fine time enjoying yer lastful day of TUSH! Jes remember to stop by our Kon-see-urge desk to not settle yore ack-ount.

Cheers, Boiled Peanut

No-tes frum youse Kon-see-urge

We been rite busy these mornin. Folks re-demin' them toe-cans fer them gol dern fine prizes an all! All them good-uns near gone!

An to re-min youse, when youse comes to settle you-ens ack-ount, brang cash monies. No O-fence to you, my TUSHee frens, but we done been stiffed by some o them per-snal cheks.

BBB

Kwote from Tushee Passages 9:5 Thow shalt have yore bags packed and left downwind your doors bi 2 in da mornin' for dis-mem-ber-kation tomorrer.

An wiles wer on dis here sub-jekt, if yer da fella dat has dis vidyo, ya mite wanna make sur dat ya takes it bak to da kon-see-urge befer ya get in ta bed tanite! Ya donna want her assitunt Lore-ayna to comes a lookin' for ya!

Lore-aynus nds ta be kept away frum shrp objcts!

Tyms a'waistn' to git redy fer Denial and Reality Checkque - Thys iz the 2nd CHEEK ov ur TUSH non-cruise! Kin hrdly w8 ta giddy-up thar!